To Be or Not to be Broken—this is the question

 Some things simply cannot be fixed. This is a sad fact and yet a fact it is.

Or is it? Is it sad? I don’t know because happy versus sad depends entirely upon one’s perspective.

I’ve had some email conversation recently and those conversations have provoked many thoughts about my “condition”. My Tarlov Cysts (TC), as they are called. I’ve spent over a year now with TC and gone through a gambit of feelings and emotions. At this point in my life, those feelings and emotions are beginning to gel into a ….Philosophy, I suppose. You know that quote we hear time and time again—“these are the times that try men’s souls”? Interestingly enough a somewhat removed relative of mine said this, Thomas Paine. If I remember right, Thomas Paine was in a branch of my family that went elsewhere. My mom would have to explain how that works ‘cause I sure don’t know.

There isn’t a person alive who does not drop in and out of times that try, or test as I think of it, our souls. I don’t know why this is. I only know testing is a part of life. I suspect testing is a part of life because it forces us to grow and move forward. We gain strength, insight and wisdom from these times. I suspect these times have to do with the survival of the “fittest” philosophy. The where and whys of this really depend on one’s perspective.

And there is it again—one’s perspective. Life is all about perspective.

I have a dear friend and we email fairly regularly. She wrote that she wished she could fix what was broken so I could have a pain-free life. My first response, my gut response to this was “I’m not broken”. My response took me by surprise, so I stopped and cogitated upon it.

I live with chronic pain. This is a fact. Most people I’ve met, including myself once upon a time, look upon this as being broken. And from one perspective I am broken. And yet from another perspective I am not broken and even if I were—some things simply cannot be “fixed”.

I ran across this video last week of Nic Vujicic.

He was born without arms or legs. Is he broken? He doesn’t think seem to think he is. He found a way to find joy in his life even though he was born into a condition that would qualify as “…tried men’s souls.” I can’t even begin to imagine his life. I admire this man. I admire that he shares his love and inspiration with so many people. We need people like this to share how they find a way to step beyond adversity. His way is Christianity. There are many ways, though.

As many ways as there are people to find them.

And here we come to another email conversation I had recently. You see, each person has to find their own way. Each person has to stumble upon the concept that works for them. And it could be anything that suddenly turns on the light bulb. And I believe we have many times in our lives that we have to find our way through the muck and the mire. Times where we struggle to find the concepts that work for us because we change and as we change, we must step back and re-think our “philosophy” of life.

My philosophy of life is a conglomeration of bits and piece, which come from reading, study, thinking and attending in the University of Hard Knocks. I paste these bits and pieces onto the post-it note of my brain and eventually those notes come together and form a philosophy. What heads up my philosophy is “bloom where you are planted,” a phrase I heard years ago from Dr. Phil. When I heard it I had the light bulb turn on, or as we say these days—a V-8 moment. I slapped my forehead and said, “Well, duh Teri.”  My life began moving forward from that moment on.

I wanted to share my insight with everyone. It was so simple! Difficult to put into practice, yes; and yet the idea, the concept was utterly simple. Of course, few people actually “got” what I was saying. Yes, intellectually anyone can look at that phrase and know what it means and yet can they actually make it work for them? Does it turn on that light bulb and make them slap their forehead and say, “duh”? Not for the most part. And that is because:

There are as many ways as there are people to find them.

Does blooming where I am planted make the pain go away? No. It simply helps me understand that I am not broken. There is so much more to me than chronic pain.

I put the question before you—what is your philosophy of life? Where did it come from? What does it provide you with? How do you use it in your life? And probably the most important question is—Is it working for you?